Monday, June 29, 2009

How Great the Yield From a Fertile Field

I am so addicted to Farm Town! Farm Town is a game on Facebook where you can build your own farm. You can do it all without even breaking a sweat! At least once a day you can find me on Farm Town plowing, planting, and harvesting the fields. My husband is quite amused with it all, since I sometimes give him a hard time about playing computer games. One afternoon he called me from work and asked, "So what are you up to?" to which I replied, "I'm just sittin here harvesting my potatoes." He broke into laughter and said, "Well, of course you are. I can't believe I even had to ask!" For me, playing Farm Town is a time of fun and relaxation in my day and sometimes even Jake gets in on the fun. He loves to plant all my fields and occasionally I let him harvest too. There's nothing to the harvesting, but if you fail to check on your crops on time, you run the risk of your crops going to waste.

Just the other day I came across a wonderful poem by Helen Steiner Rice that reminded me of Farm Town. As you have probably already guessed, reading poetry is also one of my favorite things to do. A close friend of mine gave me a whole book of poetry by Helen Steiner Rice for my birthday and this book is where I found the poem I'm about to share.

The farmer plows through
the fields of green
And the blade of the plow
is sharp and keen,

But the seed must be sown
to bring forth grain,
For nothing is born without
suffering and pain-

And God never plows
in the soul of man
Without intention and purpose
and plan,

So whenever you feel the plow's
sharp blade
Let not your heart
be sorely afraid

For, like the farmer,
God chooses a field
From which He expects
an excellent yield-

So rejoice though your heart
is broken in two,
God seeks to bring forth
a rich harvest in you.

Wow, this hit me like a ton of bricks! For the past ten months, I have felt like I was the cursed one, the one being punished, though I had no idea what I'd done to deserve losing my child.
Everytime I go anywhere, to church, or to a store, and I see women who are pregnant, or who are happily pushing their babies around in their strollers- I wonder why was I the one chosen to give up my child? What makes me different from everybody else? Why, after battling infertility for so long, did it have to be me?
I don't know the answers to these questions, and it may be that the answers are never fully revealed on this earth. But as I read this poem, something got a little clearer for me. The first thing in awhile that actually makes any sense to me. For, like the farmer, God chooses a field from which He expects an excellent yield- so rejoice though your heart is broken in two, God seeks to bring forth a rich harvest in you. " I AM NOT CURSED! I AM NOT BEING PUNISHED! I AM CHOSEN!!!"- because God is seeking and expecting a rich harvest from me!
Maybe it is our ministry- Kris, Grant, Jake, and I-God knows the love and compassion in our hearts for other people who are suffering. So He chose us to be the ones to help comfort others in their sorrow. Maybe through Granting Hope Ministries, we will reap a HUGE harvest in not necessarily observing it all, but just in the knowing that what we are doing is helping a hurting momma's heart.

I wanted to share all of this with you for two reasons- first, to share what God is doing in my heart and life, and second, to help you see in your own life where you have been chosen by God.
Friend, where is your hurt, your pain, or your suffering? It is the loss of a loved one, or the loss of a friendship/relationship? Could your suffering be in the overwhelming strain of finanical hardship? It could be any of these things and more! But the message is the same- God never plows in the soul of man, without intention and purpose and plan!

So the next time you feel like you are cursed, or that you just cannot bear the load anymore, remember that God chose you, because He sees that you are the one who will bear a rich harvest; and in doing so, you will become a stronger person, and more of a blessing to those around you. My Pastor said something yesterday that spoke to my heart and it goes something like this- "We are not here for ourselves; we are here for God and for His purpose."

It is the prayer of my heart, in this season of pain and suffering, that others may be comforted, and blessed- and most importantly, that they may be pointed to the Saviour.

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